Dogocratic National Party

It's no secret that previously popular dogocratic senators are now facing a huge uphill battle for re-election. In trying to distance themselves from the vastly unpopular administration they have reached out for endorsement from popular canines across America. Some senators, who will remain nameless (pictured below), even asked for my endorsement of both the party and their individual campaigns. I promptly told them that as long as they were trying to bankrupt my master, they could go roll in it.

I'm not keen on dog and pony shows.

Rommel Out

LeRomm

There has been much speculation regarding what Dan Gilbert, and the Cavs, are going to do this coming season in light of that fact that their whole team has immigrated to the Dominican Republic of Miami. Well I would like to throw my hat in the ring Dan. As the Most Interesting Dog in the World I'm sure that my mad ball skills proceed me. The last time I played a pickup game I sent several so called "all-stars" home to their mothers.

In completely unrelated news - D Wade you still owe me three grand. I would also like to send a shout out to Ms. James: It's over and I'm not sorry. It's not me, it's you.

So Mr. Gilbert, we will be in touch. Cavaliers fans I will announce my final selection this coming Saturday at 8 pm on ESPN in a highly anticipated program entitled "The Selection."

Rommel Out

Wubspice

Friends,

I would like to address a suggestion that has been made to me several times in the past week. Let me begin with a story. A few months ago I was flying back from the G20 summit after having testified at the request of UN security council members. It was on this flight that I met a young aspiring model by the name of Isiah Mustafa. He walked in on myself and a young stewardess in the throws of cuddling. What should have a been an awkward moment for any other man became merely an opportunity for introduction. Isiah and I came to talking and I recounted to him the many exploits of my life as the most interesting dog in the world. He asked if it would be okay to use me as the inspiration for an upcoming employment opportunity. I said that he was a grown man and he should use my example for the betterment of mankind in any way possible.

So, dear friends, NO. I am not going to make my own Old Spice commercial because I already have one. In fact I have several. Isiah still frequently calls me for ideas and new commercials. He offered to pay royalties but I told him I couldn't accept payment for being myself. It would ruin the swagger and prestige.

Rommel Out

I did not enjoy having to shave for this shoot.

Covert Operations Training

Friends,

In light of recent intelligence report leaks I have decided to come clean myself before Wiki Links exposes my participation in Pakistani covert operations under the CIA. In February of this year I was recruited by the CIA to serve as a canine intelligence analyst for the War in Afghanistan. This was, ofcourse, a coverup. My training was rigorous to say the least. We were instructed in the uses of the Taliban dialects, insurgent weapons, and deadly cuddling force.

Thank God for my training. It was the only thing that kept me going when I was captured and tortured by this woman. I endured waterboarding and forced spooning among other nameless horrors. I was eventually rescued by my Master who broke into the compound and killed 23 insurgents with his bare hands and a bowie knife. We then escaped on foot back into Pakistan and made our way home by military transport jet. That's my story Wiki Links.

You're Welcome America.

Rommel Out

GUTENTAG!

Hello Everybody,
I have decided to make my exploits and adventures with my family viral. My Master is computer challenged so it has become my responsibility. Firstly, I am Rommel, an over-sized long coat German Shepherd Dog. My breed is know as the altdeutscher schaeferhund in Europe but in the US some just call us "Old German Shepherd Dogs." I am currently eight months old and somewhere around 90lbs and 26.5 inches at the shoulder. I enjoy bacon, beebugs, tug, fanciful frolics, animal planet, and long runs in the water. I love everybody. Seriously, every single person I meet I love. Maybe it's just Ohio? I dunno but I love humans. Also, I love hot dogs and marshmallows. But most of all...I love my Master and his Wife. He is a humble Dentist but to me he is THE WORLD. He takes me on epic adventures in the woods and we go camping in his giant Zeppelin Airstream thingy. We also go to work every morning. Soon I will be trained as his medical assistant therapy dog. It's gonna be great. The following is a brief and completely accurate history...thus far....




At 3 weeks I published my first paper on chemical physics.




At 8 weeks I met my most GLORIOUS MASTER!
Can you say "BEST XMAS GIFT EVER?"



At 11 weeks I climbed the North Face of the Matterhorn.



At 3.5 months I had a moment of weakness, just to see how it felt.



At 6 months I dabbled in some Modeling.



I AM....


THE MOST INTERESTING DOG IN THE WORLD!

-Rommel out